A friend recently sent me article from Psychology Today on ways to maintain connection in romantic partnership. These also work to resurrect seemingly dead relationships and can work to create bonding where none has ever existed. I’m excerpting a short list of bonding behaviors below. The top list is non-sexual and can be used with great success with children. The bottom list should only be used between consenting adults. I encourage you to read through to the end for a link to the original article. Happy loving!
Great ways to bond with babies, children, and adults
- smiling, with eye contact
- skin-to-skin contact
- gazing into each other’s eyes
- listening intently, and restating what you hear
- forgiving or overlooking an error or thoughtless remark, past or present
- preparing your child or partner something to eat
- synchronized breathing
- cradling, or gently rocking, your partner’s head and torso (works well on a couch, or with lots of pillows)
- holding, or spooning, each other in stillness
- stroking with intent to comfort
- massaging with intent to comfort, especially feet, shoulders and head
- hugging with intent to comfort
- lying with your ear over your partner’s heart and listening to the heart beat
- making time together at bedtime a priority
Bonding Activities For Consenting Adults Only
- kissing with lips and tongues
- wordless sounds of contentment and pleasure
- touching and sucking of nipples/breasts
- gently placing your palm over your lover’s genitals with intent to comfort rather than arouse
- gentle intercourse with intent to comfort rather than arouse
Start with doing three things on the list for one minute each each day. Schedule it in and come back to it after you’ve gotten lazy and let them slide! Then enjoy how these behaviors snowball and create more of themselves and more loving feelings in your life.
Here’s the link to the whole article: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/200909/the-lazy-way-stay-in-love
Post by Kassandra Brown, Parent Coach