How can I help you?
Welcome, I’m so delighted you’ve found your way here! This page offers an introduction to parent coaching, what you can get out of a session, and some common questions about working over the phone/Skype.
As your parenting coach, I’m going to help you be open-hearted, vulnerable, and honest in all of your relationships, especially the relationship with your children. Being open-hearted, vulnerable, and honest is not a destination. It is a practice. We succeed. We fail. We have more opportunities every day. Especially with our children.
I believe passionately in the creative awesomeness that is each of us. I want to help you uncover that energy within you. I want to help you source daily actions and parenting choices from that energy.
Your Parenting Is A Reflection Of Your Inner World
I believe parenting reflects our inner landscape like nothing else. Through the experiences we have with our children, we have the opportunity to heal our old wounds, challenge our underlying beliefs, and grow into the adults we always wanted to become. Our children are mirrors and sponges and yet, somehow, they are uniquely themselves. They are calling on us to become the parents they deserve. Most of us have no training in how to do that. Now is the time to learn. Guilt will get us nowhere. Radical self-responsibility will.
What is a Parent Coach?
My coaching services are not any sort of psychoanalysis or even therapy. I start from the premise that you are your own best authority and that we can work together to help you uncover your inner wisdom.
Each session is conducted by phone, and is between one and two hours in length, depending on what works best for you.
A typical session might look like the following:
We will start with becoming aware of your breath and sensations in your body. Before we get into the work, you need to get into your body and not just your head. Then I’ll ask you questions like “What issues are up in your relationships – maybe with your children, maybe not?” and “How do you feel in your body?” Using tools of compassionate awareness we come into present time and work with the issues and emotions that are showing up right now.
Parent Coaching trusts that your body, emotions, and mind have a wisdom that we can trust. During a session we will do our best to follow the clues they offer. Like a treasure hunt, we will go through the route that is uniquely yours to find the treasures hidden in your inner landscape. Inquiry, parts work, and empathy will get us closer to your needs and what they are trying to tell us. We will listen deeply with the belief that everyone, even disowned parts of ourselves, want to be listened to with an open mind and gentle heart. We will look for constructive ways to meet your needs and free up your energy.
Even more useful than the parenting tools I bring to our work is the energy of compassionate awareness. It is easy to get heady, sidetracked, or blaming with ourselves when we start to uncover our previously hidden beliefs and needs. When we start to open up to ourselves, it is so important to do so with gentleness, curiosity, and compassion. Again and again, I will help bring you back to compassionate awareness.
A session ends with heartfelt thanks and homework. Homework?!? Yes. I have found that the value of insights achieved during the coaching phone call is increased exponentially by putting those insights into practice in your day-to-day parenting.
Some advantages to phone based parent coaching
- Ease – You can choose to have a phone coaching session from the place of your choosing. Feel safest in your home, at the park, or in the car? You choose the environment that is right for you.
- A gentler first step – It can require a lot of courage to ask for help. It is less scary to do so over the phone for many people.
- Anonymity – It can be easier to feel safe and open up to asking for the help you want over the phone. This can lead to deeper, more effective time together.
- Convenience and accessibility – You don’t have to drive to meet me. This saves you time and makes scheduling easier. And, hey, it’s more environmentally friendly to call rather than drive.
- Less stress about appearances – When you meet someone face to face, most people want to look the right way to be accepted. This includes clothing, hair styles, facial expressions and body language. When we connect over the phone, all of the visual distraction is eliminated.
- Research suggests it is just as effective – Several studies have come out looking at different forms of phone counseling and many therapists are publishing their experiences. From all of this research, it seems that therapy over the telephone can be just as effective as being in person.
Some Concerns and Solutions to Telephone Based Parent Coaching
- Concern: You may be so skeptical about receiving real support over the telephone, that you never reach out to make that first connection and see for yourself. An easy solution is to have a free consultation with me. Talk with me about any questions and concerns. The initial consultation is always free leaving you with the possibility of a very big plus (becoming a happier, more effective parent) and no significant minus. Just a few minutes of your time.
- Concern: Being physically present with your parenting coach may help you feel more connected with him or her. Solution: My view of coaching is that you are the expert. My role is to help you find your expertise and apply it to your situation. Being alone with yourself during our sessions can actually increase your sense of self-responsibility and self-worth while still offering you support and a sense that you aren’t alone. Thus this concern can, in reality, be an asset.
- Concern: Some people feel safer letting themselves become emotional in the physical presence of another person. Possible Solution: And some people don’t like how vulnerable they feel when someone else can see them cry or turn red from anger or curl up in the fetal position. There is a great deal of freedom with being able to take your own form of self-expression without worrrying about how it looks to me or if it is in some way “ok”. For some, it’s a great idea to have a trusted friend or partner present during a call. This person is then there to provide silent support, including physical touch if requested, and to witness your work without having to be one talking you through it. This can be AMAZING and I highly recommend it for those wanting faster transformation.
- Concern: Bad phone connections and other technical issues can interfere with phone sessions. Solution: All possible care will be taken from my side to ensure that I have reliable equipment to help us connect with one another. In the event we are unable to form a coherent connection, we will determine an appropriate solution. This could easily include rescheduling, offering a free or discounted session, and troubleshooting the problem so that it does not occur in the future. Always let me know if you’re having trouble hearing me and I’ll do the same.
What has research shown about the effectiveness of phone counseling?
There have been many studies on telephone counseling over the past 15 years. A recent study in the Journal of Counseling and Development showed that people are generally more satisfied with phone counseling than face-to-face counseling. A much higher percentage (93% for telephone compared to 63% for face-to-face) said they would seek counseling again. It also found that more than half (58%) of people who had experienced both phone and in-person counseling preferred phone.
Other studies found that people who are experiencing depression were less likely to drop out of telephone therapy and consistently showed improved mood. One such study was published in the Archives of General Psychiatry in 2005.
By Kassandra Brown
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